*mid-autumn chaos*
i just read the title of my last post, and i realized that day really was the beginning of the end of sorts for me. that morning at church, tony spoke about moving on.... and it was all that was needed to confirm what i had been thinking about for several weeks. the possibility entered my mind ever so gently then, and it kept growing and growing as i thought and prayed more about it. it became a reality that would be inevitable. the struggle i had in the last few months in balancing mother's choice and church was the instigator, but i remembered what God had called me to and all the pieces were in place now. so this past week, i met with my pastor, with my supervisor and the big boss of my current job. and it's official: i will be moving on. i've resigned from mother's choice in order to volunteer full-time with the vine.
i've only been at mother's choice for barely over 2 months, but it had mostly been a positive experience, albeit maddeningly busy. it was challenging to me professionally, but i felt i had learnt so much. i really didn't have much to complain about. however, in the past few days since it had been made public that i'm leaving, i have felt much more pressure and that feeling of being "used".... because my time is split between the office (doing counseling and admin) and the girls' hostel, it had been a juggling act. and this week i definately felt like they're trying to milk me for all i'm worth before i leave. i don't know whether i should be upset that they're doing this. i mean, i am a willing volunteer, so i can see why they would want me to work more (free labour). but i had made it explicitly clear before i started that i wanted steady hours, and working in the hostel definately is not steady hours. and they've expanded my supposed 1 shift a week to 3-4 shifts every week for the next few weeks.... since i'm almost done with all my office work, i feel like they're just making me stick around to do the grunt work.
anyway. i've had enough of venting. i still have 6.5 days of annual leave owed to me, so i can still finish earlier than they're making me.
on a cheerier note, our plus group went up to the peak last night, and just basked in the moonlight and the glow of our lanterns. eventhough there were about a thousand other people up there, we took a lesser known path and had almost complete privacy. we ate cheap mooncakes and told animal horror stories.... it was just so good to relax. now i'm listening to my "sounds of canada" cd that i got at the 180 flea market, and trying to remember what it was like to be surrounded by real nature.... *sigh* 4 more months and i'll finally get to see the land of the maple leaf again! my parents are also coming in november. i dreamt last night that i saw my dad, while i was on my way to a beauty contest in a government office.... what the heck does that mean??
* * *
i miss my boo. he's leading a team of 12 on a mission to cebu, philippines. pray for them when you get the chance.
i just read the title of my last post, and i realized that day really was the beginning of the end of sorts for me. that morning at church, tony spoke about moving on.... and it was all that was needed to confirm what i had been thinking about for several weeks. the possibility entered my mind ever so gently then, and it kept growing and growing as i thought and prayed more about it. it became a reality that would be inevitable. the struggle i had in the last few months in balancing mother's choice and church was the instigator, but i remembered what God had called me to and all the pieces were in place now. so this past week, i met with my pastor, with my supervisor and the big boss of my current job. and it's official: i will be moving on. i've resigned from mother's choice in order to volunteer full-time with the vine.
i've only been at mother's choice for barely over 2 months, but it had mostly been a positive experience, albeit maddeningly busy. it was challenging to me professionally, but i felt i had learnt so much. i really didn't have much to complain about. however, in the past few days since it had been made public that i'm leaving, i have felt much more pressure and that feeling of being "used".... because my time is split between the office (doing counseling and admin) and the girls' hostel, it had been a juggling act. and this week i definately felt like they're trying to milk me for all i'm worth before i leave. i don't know whether i should be upset that they're doing this. i mean, i am a willing volunteer, so i can see why they would want me to work more (free labour). but i had made it explicitly clear before i started that i wanted steady hours, and working in the hostel definately is not steady hours. and they've expanded my supposed 1 shift a week to 3-4 shifts every week for the next few weeks.... since i'm almost done with all my office work, i feel like they're just making me stick around to do the grunt work.
anyway. i've had enough of venting. i still have 6.5 days of annual leave owed to me, so i can still finish earlier than they're making me.
on a cheerier note, our plus group went up to the peak last night, and just basked in the moonlight and the glow of our lanterns. eventhough there were about a thousand other people up there, we took a lesser known path and had almost complete privacy. we ate cheap mooncakes and told animal horror stories.... it was just so good to relax. now i'm listening to my "sounds of canada" cd that i got at the 180 flea market, and trying to remember what it was like to be surrounded by real nature.... *sigh* 4 more months and i'll finally get to see the land of the maple leaf again! my parents are also coming in november. i dreamt last night that i saw my dad, while i was on my way to a beauty contest in a government office.... what the heck does that mean??
* * *
i miss my boo. he's leading a team of 12 on a mission to cebu, philippines. pray for them when you get the chance.
posted by jana* at 5:47 PM
